2025-06-25 03:39:11
Eagle-eyed trackheads following the Ostrava Golden Spike in Czechia might have noticed American hurdler Chris Robinson, an NCAA champion at Alabama, winning the 400 meters with some unorthodox form. Midway through the event, Robinson began reaching, after every hurdle, to adjust himself in a way familiar to any penis-haver. Surely even a top track athlete would not be able to win a race, let alone in a season-best 48.05 seconds, with his dong flapping around. Going balls out usually does not lend itself to going balls out.
Some research was needed. Track's not a huge deal here in the States, and the only video existed as a livestream on a subscription service. So we turn to the Swedes, who you'd expect to be all over a penis if one presented itself in Lane 3. From national sport newspaper Sportbladet:
2025-06-25 02:48:32
Time for your weekly edition of the Defector Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. And buy Drew’s book, The Night The Lights Went Out, while you’re at it. Today, we're talking about socks, mowing the lawn, filth, and more.
My apologies for a shorter than usual bag today. I’m just coming off of a week of work in the field for SF Gate, and I’ve already started in on Why Your Team Sucks, the debut of which is on the horizon. So I’ve been a touch squeezed. But fear not, the take lab is still bustling and ready to produce more sterling content for you in the coming weeks and months.
2025-06-25 01:44:52
Back in January, an arbitration case between the NFL and the NFL Players Association came to a quiet end. The case was initiated by a grievance filed by the NFLPA in 2022, which argued that NFL owners had colluded with each other to deny players fully guaranteed contracts. The arbitrator's final ruling, that the league's owners had not engaged in collusion, was public, but the details of his ruling were not. The arbitrator's full report was published today by Meadowlark Media's Pablo Torre, and it reveals how the NFL's corporate structure makes it possible for owners to openly discuss collusion without technically breaking any rules.
The full ruling, which Torre covers at length in his latest podcast episode, is primarily concerned with a March 2022 meeting between NFL owners and the NFL Management Council (NFLMC). This meeting occurred just a few weeks after Deshaun Watson signed an unprecedented five-year, $230 million contract with the Cleveland Browns that was fully guaranteed. The NFLPA argued that during this meeting the owners conspired to ensure that Watson's contract would be the last of its kind, and that evidence of this conspiracy can be found in part by the fact that quarterbacks Lamar Jackson, Kyler Murray, and Russell Wilson were not offered fully guaranteed deals upon entering free agency after Watson's deal was signed.
2025-06-25 00:45:32
In the hours before Game 7 of the NBA Finals on Sunday, ESPN desk analyst Kendrick Perkins fielded a contrived gambling question about whether or not Chet Holmgren would score 15 points. His reasoning was that Holmgren would, since the Oklahoma City Thunder big had expressed frustration with his previous performance. Or anyway, that's all the reasoning Perkins could fit in before Stephen A. Smith cut him off to scream about how his co-host was annoying him, because things are different in the NBA Finals. Right before the segment mercifully cut to commercial, Bob Myers mounted a defense of Perkins that wound up being a scathing indictment of the whole operation. "Just because you yell something, doesn't mean it's true," he said.
2025-06-25 00:10:17
The Las Vegas Aces are bad. Not “bad by their championship standards"—just kind of bad. Two years ago, they lost six games total. In less than a third of this season, they have lost seven. By the grace of the incredibly forgiving WNBA playoff system, they are, with a 6-7 record, the last team in. So it was actually kind of heartening to see them gut out a win at home on Sunday afternoon, rallying in the fourth quarter to beat the Indiana Fever and avoid their first four-game losing streak since 2018. Ahead of what could be some morale-boosting games against Connecticut and Washington this week, here was proof that the Aces can still lock in.
It was not looking that way at halftime this weekend, after what might have been A’ja Wilson’s worst half of professional basketball. Missed layups, contested pull-ups and battles with Aliyah Boston had kept her to 2-of-12 shooting. “I just want to apologize to everybody that was watching. That was not a normal A’ja Wilson night,” she said in the postgame interview on ESPN. Spinning to the cup and timing up big blocks on the defensive end, she had already played the second half like an apology. At the end of the night, Wilson's line was a sightlier 8-of-21, but she apologized again for good measure. “Sorry if you had to see that, but we got the dub.”
2025-06-24 23:44:42
Look at that image above. Really look at it. Now. And do not avert your eyes. Satan went to a lot of work to make this happen, and that work must be honored with your attention.
Yes, that is Rob Manfred and John Fisher, shown commemorating the upcoming 70th anniversary of the creation of The Jetsons, in Las Vegas. These two came complete with ill-fitting hard hats jammed unconvincingly onto their hydrocephalic heads, just in case lightning finally, belatedly strikes them down. They are there to celebrate the production of a sign that says a baseball field will be built on a specific site, and they are smiling to celebrate their mutual refusal to consider the evil and greed and stupidity and general imperviousness to failure that they are honoring this day. They look happy, all told.
